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I’m desperate and unemployed

Hello, welcome back! Well, I know it’s been a while. Life has been… crazy, to say the least, and I’ve come here to share with you guys what’s been happening to me lately.

First, I’m unemployed and I’ve been trying to find a job that’ll allow me to keep going to college, but that proved to be a pain in the ass. So there’s that.  Then there is my country, that’s heading in the wrong direction and it’s very hard to find a job and keep it. Also, it’s very hard to survive with my savings because the prices are going through the roof!

Also, there’s this blog that I always keep in my mind and I always find myself trying to write something, but I have to be honest with you. Even writing this is proving to be the hardest thing on earth, I think I have a subtle case of writer’s block.

I’m trying to write, but I have to be honest, I find myself trying to write something and then leaving it as a draft because I think it needs a lot more to be published. I know I said I wasn’t going to be so hard on myself, but whatever those things on my drafts are, they are ANYTHING but publishable.

I’m trying to find a job, like ANY job, even as a writer or as a translator, but I guess I’m out of luck. I’ll keep looking, maybe I’ll get lucky soon enough. I really hope things look up anytime now. I’m trying to be optimistic about things but I have been feeling a little blue a depressed lately. It’s just that my actual situation is bringing me down. Luckily I have my boyfriend with me that offered to help me, but I don’t want that. I want to be able to pay for my own things, to earn my own money and I don’t want to owe anything to anyone.

Anyway, this is me, trying to let you guys know what I’ve been up to and that I’m still alive. I’ll try to keep you post it, maybe try to write something non-job-search related. But I can’t promise you anything.

Thank you so much for taking your time to read this. I really really appreciate it. Thank you so much for letting me be part of your life, at least from time to time. I would love to know, in the comment section down below if you’ve ever faced a situation like this in your past and what did you do to feel better when you thought that there was no way out of it? I love reading comments and I always try to answer them!

I hope I see you next time… bye!


Oh well, oh well. Look who rose back from the dead.

Hello everyone! I know it’s been ages since my last post, but I guess… I’m back? I love being a blogger and I love writing posts for you to read and to comment on but lately, I’ve been having a lot of issues and I couldn’t set myself to write something that will be “trendy” or “clickbaity” enough. And every time I wanted to write something I thought that as my “comeback post” it had to be something really good and as time went by whatever thing I was able to write wasn’t good enough.

Honestly, this year is building up to be a literal hell of non-stop to-do lists and tasks to do and I’m already considering to let go of some hobbies of mine, or at least put them on hiatus. And as I was thinking about all the things I will have to leave behind this year I came across the question about this blog.

Like I said before, I can’t keep this blog up as a professional blogger. Even though it hurts like hell (because I’ve put so much effort into it) I have to come to terms with not being able to go on. But I simply can’t with the idea of having to let go of it. So… I came to the conclusion that I’m going to keep writing but this blog it’s going to be a little bit more personal. It’s going to be my outlet and sadly I’m not going to put that much effort promoting it. I’ll try to write as much as I can, I’ll write about my day, my issues, college, science, work, house-keeping shit and such. I’ll try to be open with you, I’ll try to be honest and I’m going to be ME. I don’t know what this year has in store for me, but I can assure it’s going to be a pain in the ass. At least I guess it’s going to be entertaining.

So, if you think you want to keep following this blog because you consider this might be fun… be my guest! Welcome to my life, I hope you enjoy the ride. I’m pretty sure I’m going to cry a lot.

I hope you join me on this adventure! I consider feedback is love and it’s always welcomed.

See you next time… bye!

Today I have to say goodbye to 4 of my fish.

Today it’s the day that I have to say goodbye to my fish. No, they didn’t die. Luckily they are in perfect health but they have outgrown their tank and I have to give them away to someone with a bigger tank.

How did this happen? Well, when I started my tank I didn’t know much about this hobby and I asked the guy at the store for help and he told me that a yoyo loach and a pleco can live in a 10-gallon tank. He didn’t tell me about yoyo loaches being schooling fish, they didn’t ask questions about my filtration capacity AND they didn’t give me a warning about the potential size of these creatures.

When I came home I wanted to learn a little more about the fish I just bought and I found out a lot of things that left me in awe: I did everything wrong and my yoyo loach was prone to be stressed all the time because he was alone and my cute little pleco? He was going to be HUGE.  In an attempt to fix that, I went to another shop and they told me that all I had to do was buy two loaches more, which I ended up doing, and that there were going to be fine.

After doing all that and feeling like I dodged a bullet, I sadly found out that a 10-gallon tank was like a closet for these guys and they needed a bigger tank, like ten times bigger.

With all the information I gathered, I made a plan:  I was going to keep them in there for as long as I could (when they were still babies) and then I was going to buy a bigger tank for them. But then life got in the way and when the time for me to upgrade my tank came: I had no money at all. It was so sad, but I had to make the right choice: I was going to give them away.

As I am typing this I’m looking at them one last time before I had to give them to their new owner and it breaks my heart. I don’t want to be selfish, that’s why I’m giving them away, but a part of me just wishes that I could keep them. Because they are so interesting to watch, I love to just sit in front of my tank and watch them swim around…

And this is why, when I wrote  How to set up a Freshwater Aquarium from scratch, I said that you have to do your research BEFORE going to the store. Don’t mess it up like I did. Buy fish that you can keep until the end, otherwise, you are going to end up emotionally attached to some creatures that you are going to give away!! And trust me, it’s awful!

I’m happy because I’m doing the right thing. They deserve better.  It just breaks my heart that I’m not going to see them anymore.

I’ll be twitting today letting you know how the delivery of my fish went. The good thing is that I get to share my whole experience while repopulating my tank with you guys!

Has this ever happened to you? What do you think about sellers that would say anything in order to make a sell? Have you ever had yoyo loaches? What do you think of them? Let me know in the comment section, below!

Anyway, I hope I see you next time… bye!

Taking everything for granted: the reason why things have to end.

I know, I know, I’ve been so M.I.A. that it’s not even funny. I’ve been so busy guys. I went on vacation (If you are following me on Twitter you already knew that) and it was awesome but it also left me no time to write. And the week before that I was really busy with all the planning and buying all the things I needed because guess what: I was so focused on my blog that I completely forgot about my trip and I remembered a week before leaving.

But let’s focus on what’s important: today’s blogpost. Today I’m going to talk about endings and how hard it is to say goodbye to some things in life.

Lately I feel like a lots of things in my life are coming to an end. My neighbors moved out of their house and they moved to another province, my favorite TV show (The Vampire Diaries – I know, don’t judge me) finished last Friday and my favorite TV show of all time (Bones) it´s coming to an end too. I also feel like a lot of things in my life are about to change and even though I am not able to not panic, I’m a little excited for what’s to come.

I feel like things has to come to an end so new things can begin to happen. There has to be a balance, we need closure so we can appreciate what happened and we can accept the new things in life.  Sometimes closure involves crying and feeling sad, it’s not easy, I’m not saying that. It’s just that I feel that it has to happen at some point. If something is forever, that means it’s never going to end and we might take it for granted instead of appreciating. Why do I have to try to enjoy it right now if it’s going to be there forever, right?

Instead of that, since life is a constant surprise, we don’t know what’s going to happen next. Sometimes we end up saying goodbye to someone that was supposed to be around for a lot longer and we never saw it coming. We get mad because we weren’t ready and we regret not saying certain things or spending more time with that person. And even though it’s painful I feel like we tend to appreciate things and people even more after those things happen. We acknowledge that sometimes those things are a matter of luck and not knowing when they are coming to an end helps us to make the most out of it. Isn’t that the whole point of “You only live once”? The premise that life has an expiration  date is the very thing that encourages us to do things we might not consider doing ever? To do something now because you may not be able to do it later? It wasn’t until my neighbors told me they were thinking about moving away that I started to try to see them as much as I could. Before that, college was always first or I always had to do something first: I was taking them for granted. It wasn’t until I knew that them being my neighbors had an expiration date that I started to see them more often.

I feel like any important ending in your life marks the end of an era and the beginning of a new one. I’m really sad for the things that lately ended because they meant so much for me and they began to happen when I was in a really dark place and they really helped me, but I’m also excited and a little terrified of all the things that are to come. In this new phase of my life I’m sure a lot of things are going to change, but I’m open to it.

Well, this is me rambling about endings.  It just that lately I was overwhelmed about things coming to an end and I felt the need to write something about it. I hope it makes sense. I also hope that this inspires you to not take things or people for granted, to appreciate them for as long as you can without knowing a goodbye is going to happen soon. I hope it helps you to enjoy the things in life because you can, because you are alive. Just because. I think it sounds silly but even writing this made me rethink a lot of things and I really, really, really hope it made you rethink too.

So tell me what you think, do you think we need an expiration date to appreciate things? Has this happened to you, that when you knew you were about to lose something/someone you started to appreciate it/them more? Do you feel the same way? Did this post made you rethink something? Let me know in the comment section below! See you next time, bye!